I really love this picture of him. He’s not looking at me. He’s not smiling. He’s not moving. He’s just sitting…staring off…serious…handsome.
It reflects a side of him that is sometimes hard to capture with my camera. He’s my oldest. Not one day have I ever missed the days when he was a baby. Not for one day do I wish I could go back and relive that time. Not because he was a rough baby. He wasn’t. I just think that if you really live in the present, you don’t miss it when it becomes the past in regards to loved ones that are still with you. I love seeing who he is becoming. I remember and cherish the days he used to lay swaddled in my arms and fall asleep. As fond as those memories are…I don’t want to go back in time. I want today with him. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Today.
I was almost so distracted by his younger siblings that I nearly missed what he said as he slipped something in my pocket on the school playground. “Will you hold this? I got it from the Treasure Box today.” And he ran off to play. I stuck my hand in my pocket to pull out a little cardboard box with funny little snowmen on it.
I knew the minute I saw it that the puzzle was not for him, but for his youngest brother. He had earned a reward at school and instead of using it on himself he picked out a little puzzle for his brother. I asked him about it and he responded, “I knew he liked it, so I got it for him.”
He is a normal 6 year old who can be selfish and fights with his brothers. I often wonder if he is getting anything I am trying to teach him. I’m grateful for a little Treasure Box puzzle that reminded me that he is listening when I don’t realize. He is watching. He is learning. He is getting it. Somewhere along the way my oldest has learned generosity and thinking of others before himself…and if I wasn’t paying attention I would have missed noticing.
“I knew he’d like it, so I got it for him.” Simple as that.
Makes me wonder what do I know that someone in my life would like…and what is keeping me from doing it or giving it?